First there was rain. Which I’m convinced was brought on by the arrival of the fair here in Dartmouth
Spent the day at home, tummy issues. Feeling slightly more human. Hoping a good night’s sleep will help as well. Pain in my left hip is still barely manageable to the point I don’t know what else to try.
However, I did manage to help make chilli, good hearty meal for the first day of October
Wisdom is funny. I feel wise about some things. More times than not I feel like I’m never gonna clue into things.
Hard work. This healthy living journey is a job of hard work. However. Hard work always pays off in the end.
Until then I need to start putting my dukes down and focus on the job of how to rebuild my healthy life. Is there ONE small change I can make today? Why does it need to change? What will the change do?
I can do this.
Will there never be a day where I feel 100% ok?
I seem to recall feeling good. I recall having slight aches. Or slight pain. Or tired. Never have I felt ok. Like everything is right with the world.
I knew I what I was getting into. I knew the surgery was going to alter my day to day life. I knew that the road would be long and winding.
I’m so over this now.
I want to wake up and stretch and hop out of bed. I want to sneeze and not flinch. I want to walk without pain.
Man. I guess I’ve got a case of the whines. That girl who didn’t want to adult last week. Isn’t adulting at all today.
And do you know what?
It’s ok to be not ok.
If we don’t allow ourselves to feel it, if we try to squash it down; it’s gonna become too much to handle.
I just need to have my moment and then take a deep breath. There will be time enough to adult later.
Finally!!! They realize that this is a controlled substance and should be sold in smaller containers!!! This is like crack, and when I buy a large tub, I eat a large tub. With a spoon. In private. With my mouth. Hahaha.
Confession: Pope Francis is a rock star. He makes it easy to say your Catholic these days.
I’ve been watching the CNN coverage on his whirlwind trip to the US. I’ve watched him bring Congressmen to tears. Watched him not dine with the elite but the meek.
I’ve watched him lay his hands and bring grace and hope to people young and old. Then there were the selfies with the young Catholics. Mass on such a level I have never seen.
He is a beacon of hope and grace, and he makes me smile. He makes me stand a little taller, and proud to be a member of his flock.
Oh had I the opportunity to go and be in his presence. What an amazing thing that would have been.
He puts into practice the ideals Catholics hold dear. He lives his faith in action. I can only hope to do that as I move through life.
Today at church they kicked off Sunday School, and the kids had fun. The lesson today was from our church’s patron saint; Saint Vincent DePaul. Feed the hungry; comfort the sad.
Lessons we can all use.
No Zumba today since I wrenched my shoulder. So it was a lot of relaxing with the cat;
But before that was our day out with Thing2. We are so loving these Saturday’s. Cause we know they are numbered.
And now it’s family time, tea and cookies for me, wings for the rest of them and of course: Dr Who
Tonight’s fun fact:
I am functioning on a (in Buffyspeak) “fire bad; tree pretty” kind of level right now.
The kind of night where you are driving home and don’t quite recall how you got where you are.
Watching a movie with the hubs and Thing2 and heading to bed.
I didn’t phone it in. I danced my ass off. However, I did it so that I KNEW I didn’t waste the morning I wished I stayed in bed.
My alarm went off and I was having none of it. I didn’t even want to go to work. I wanted to stay in my pj’s and not adult at all today.
I didn’t. I adulted. I got up. I drove my ass to Zumba. I shook my ass. I went to work.
Today, life was my bitch.
I saw this on my Facebook feed recently, and it made me think (thanks Sparkpeople)
There are other days when I know I’m a hot mess and I just don’t care. If you don’t like it feel free to look away.
I do the best I can, some days. Others it’s a battle to get back home to my pj’s. There are days when I know full well I didn’t put my best effort forward, but pointing it out or revelling in it will only irritate me. Then you will have my wrath. I don’t have a lot of wrath, but I can only be pushed so far.
No one should live their life hearing only ‘next times’ you need your own fair share of applause.
I have amazing friends who are my light in this all. They are always there just when I need it most and I love them to the moon and back.
Do you embrace your glorious mess?