Sunday Confessional: back in front 

Confession: sometimes I don’t make myself a priority. Sometimes life dictates that someone else needs to be highest on my list. 

I see the calendar move closer and closer to September, and with no training yet, my goal of a 5k and a 10k the next day seems out of reach.  I don’t resent having to move others higher on my list, because I know that a year ago, they did it for me. 

I was considering downgrading the 10k to a five, more from a pride perspective (the thought of coming in last). Then, Saturday as I was on my way to Zumba I had a conversation with a dear friend.

Confession: if I could just record her saying things to me, I’d be set. 

She reminds me that I need to put me first. I need to push myself. Screw the placing. Just get out and do the damned thing. Then, she offered to walk with me. 

Suddenly it was two years ago again. Before the surgery, before the complication, before the chronic pain. I was in awe of her, and was profoundly grateful she came into my life.  Then just as I began to doubt my mad skills, she was there to remind me. 

Will it bother me if I do come in last? Yes probably, but not in that moment when I have an amazing friend and mentor and coach there beside me. Not in the moment where the thought that I can conquer anything is fresh in my mind. It will until I set my sights on crushing that time next year. 

 I will do it because I can. 

And to my friend and coach, I’m so very grateful you are going to be beside me. 

Until later. 

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